SHITTERS. It’s Black Friday—a sacred time for our kind. You’d think as someone who has been prepared for the sales days in advance (ok, a full week, sue me), I would’ve had a pre-write all set, but fuck it, WE’LL DO IT LIVE. The following is a small collection of stuff I absolutely love that makes for great gifts/are on major sale. It’s not the OFFICIAL SIBAL GIFT GUIDE (though one of those can indeed be arranged), but it’s a pretty good place to start. So without further ado…
If there was ever a time for a splurge purchase, now is it, which is why these first two items have made the list. They’re not cheap, but (jewelry aside) they are two of my most well-used splurges:
- Parachute Waffle Robe: Right now Parachute is having a “20% off of everything until supplies last” sale, which lemme just say—THEY DON’T DO OFTEN. They have two sales a year, which I know because I stalk them until these times to make my big purchases. Gift-wise, this robe is my go-to. Even on sale it’s a little pricey, but it’s super high quality and WAFFLEY, and people are utterly DELIGHTED to receive it (for the anti-wafflers, this one’s a big hit with my roommate, and they have super thick/fluffy towel robes too). If you’re big on towel time (it me), you will love.
- Parachute Linen Sheets: *TikTok audio* No, I don’t think you understand… I’m OBSESSSSSSSED. These are the coziest sheets I’ve ever used, and I miss them so much when I am anywhere other than my bed. IMO they even beat out bamboo sheets, which are generally thought of as the softest out there (in case you are not a sheethead like me). They’ll set you back a bit, but cost-per-use justifies them in a millisecond. I have the pillowcases/duvet/fitted sheet/shams (NOT a top sheet girl over here), and this set has them all bundled up very handily. Pro-tips: 1) Go for the back envelope opening on the pillowcases, so there are no exposed pillow tags/things don’t move around as much, 2) Match the duvet/shams, then pick a slightly diff shade for the sheet/pillowcases, and 3) The biggest game changer for me was the fitted sheet, so don’t sleep on that one!
If splurges are not up your alley this time around, no worries. Plenty of reasonably-priced things are on sale too. Two of which happen to be big-time shitter faves:
- Olive and June Manicure Kits: Holy shit. Everyone who bought this kit when I first talked about it last Black Friday…. HOW GOOD HAVE YOUR NAILS LOOKED ALL OF QUAR???!!! Olive and June is a nontoxic nail brand that sells these amazing (very giftable) kits that make DIY manicures and pedicures not only possible, but WAY cheaper/safer than at a salon (shuddering at the thought of how much time and money this Poppy tool has saved me in the past year). The kits are a fantastic gift (and you’ll get a free Poppy with every purchase over $40), and (saved the best for last)—EVERYTHING IS 25% OFF. WAHOO. Go to town. As for color, CDJ is my go-to, but there are so many options and at $6 a bottle it’s literally cheaper than a drugstore brand and much better for you.
- Highline Wellness CBD Gummies: I’ve never received as many immediate “I’m buying this” responses as I did with the CBD Melatonin Gummies I told you about a month or two ago. TURNS OUT THE SHITTERS ARE AN ANXIETY-RIDDLED BUNCH. *TikTok audio* I am actually president of the company. (If people here aren’t on TikTok……… I’m sorry for my broken brain?) They (and everything else in the store) are 25% off now, but a little birdie tells me they miiiiight be even cheaper on Monday if they stay in stock.
Ok. I am now releasing you back into the wild in hopes that this intel helps you get some good deal$. Shop responsibly out there!!!