shit i bought and liked no. 52: hangover helper

SHITTERS! I’m back on the eve of summer’s (supposed) end with a few critical recommendations to carry us through the rest of the year. If you’ve come here for frizz recs, the investigation is still ongoing, though I’m pleased to share that we do have several new leads (can you tell I spent my entire weekend binge-reading Karin Slaughter?). Blowdrying with a combo of Olaplex No. 6 and No. 7 has definitely helped (I have the Dyson blowdryer and it has by far been my best investment for styling/growing out my easily heat-damaged hair), but I am still working on my quest for dream hair that looks smooth without semi-time/labor intensive finessing. I do, however, have a plan for this. Aside from buying the Living Proof shampoo/conditioner next, I plan on becoming as famous as possible in order to gain access to industry professionals other than my current hairstylist who has some kind of deal with Moroccan Oil (love the guy but I do NOT love acting like those products do anything other than smell bad), so then I can bug THEM to teach me everything. (This also happens to be my plan for learning how to contour.) I’m playing the long game here, but it seems pretty foolproof. 

ANYWHO. You’re not here for my master plan, so let’s get to today’s shit, SHALL WE? Labor Day is supposedly the end of summer, but I have a feeling that in this corner of the internet, a Hangover Helper may indeed be a year-round necessity. That is why I’m back in your inboxes with the best one I have found to date—a recommendation I feel uniquely qualified to make as a human who cannot get through two cocktails without a raging headache the next morning. (I am not proud of this fact, but I share it with you to build my CREDIBILITY in the space.) 

I’m not a huge drinker, but I am known to get a notoriously bad hangover. Always have—was resigned to thinking I always would. But a month spent living in Montauk this summer inspired me to figure it the fuck out so I wouldn’t spend the entire time curled in the fetal position begging God for sweet relief (my preferred coping mechanism aside from laying on cold wood floors and Postmating Cofax breakfast burritos).

My financial goals include being able to one day call the in-home IV people whenever I drink, but according to my bank statements I am NOWHERE CLOSE TO THAT AT THE MOMENT, so I settled on the next best alternative—LiquidIV. They’re packets of electrolytes (sugar, salt, and vitamins) that you empty into a glass of water after a night of drinking and FACE before going to bed. And my sweet shitters, I swear to you—they have been a life saver.

They’re very sweet taste-wise—nothing you’d ever be inclined to consume sober—but by that point you’ve spent the past however long tossing back seltzers or mixed drinks or wine with reckless abandon. Your body is no longer a temple. I promise you can do it. (Speaking of summer bevs, hiiiiighly recommend swapping your seltzers for Loverboys.)

I started leaving a packet and a glass of water by my bedside table before a big night out, and mix/chug right before I go to sleep (cavities be damned!). In the morning you might be tired and puffy, but you will also be fully capable of getting out of bed, chugging another bottle of water, and getting your life together. Which at 1pm on a Monday seems a lot easier than it does by say, Sunday of Labor Day Weekend?

Obviously, if you don’t drink, you might have no need for this. Good for you! This is not to encourage anyone to drink excessively (this one goes out to my lawyer! xoxo!), but simply to make the morning after a few bevs a bit more tolerable if you are in the market for something like that.

They sell them in 16 packs of Amazon and they come in lots of flavors, but I can only vouch for Lemon Lime so far (it’s not delicious, but that’s not why we’re here). They’re packaged individually, which is not ideal waste-wise, but it does make them very easy to bring along when you travel and lets you be the hero who passes them out to your friends (they are a bachelor/ette party must-have).

I know there are a few other similar products out there—I haven’t experimented with many, but if you have/like them better than LiquidIV taste/results-wise, lmk! Would love to try/compare! Also, if you can help me on my mission to find the softest, comfiest, most flattering, non-see-through white t-shirt, I will be FOREVER INDEBTED TO YOU. I have been on the hunt for a stupid amount of time—I can’t believe I didn’t think to ask until just now! Please send me your recs, I am very desperate for basics that are not workout clothes. In the meantime, STAY HYDRATED OUT THERE!


P.S. Should I switch to Substack? I wouldn’t make you pay for it (unless any of you feel like being patrons of the ARTS), but I am being influenced by the people of Twitter and do like the interface a lot. (Apologies to my friend Tommy whose advice to do this I have ignored for at least two years.) Lmk if you have thoughts?

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